Sunday, June 21, 2015

Coming back from an exchange program and how to not be "homesick"

One year ago I came back from my exchange year in america. I was confused because it was hard for me to accept the fact that I left a life behind, that I build up in just a few months but got so attached to that if felt more like my life than anything ever felt before, but I was also confused because I was happy to be home with my family and friends again, back in a life that I have lived in for more than 17 years. I came out of the airport crying so hard because I just wanted to go back trough those doors and take the next flight back but at the same time I cried because I was so happy to see all of my friends and family again who had welcomed me back in such a sweet and loving way. I didn't want to be back in my home country but at the same time I was looking forward to a lot of great things there, and after one year of staying back "home" I still feel like this. I can't really call anything home no more. I still have a super tight bond with my friends and family over there in america and I wouldn't hesitate to call it home but at the same time I have grown a super close relationship with my friends and family over here and they are my home as well.

What I just tried to describe is a very common feeling. I would assume that every exchange student has those kind of problems and every exchange has to cope with it. Being torn up between to different "homes" is the price for an exchange year and I can honestly say that there isn't a perfect way to leave those feelings behind, there is only a way to learn to live with it.

People who don't know the feeling would always tell me that it will go away by itself and if I do get homesick I could always Skype and apps such as WhatsApp will help  to keep in touch and during the school breaks I could just visit again. But guys that is not how it works! Skyping, texting or even visiting will never bring back the feeling that I had when I lived there!!! I mean yes it sure helps to keep in touch but what does really help when you can't stop being homesick?

To get over "homesickness" you have to first know what you want your future to be like ? Do you ever want to go back or do you want to build up a life in your home country and just come back to the place of your exchange to visit ?

If you decide to not go back and stay in your home country instead, its really important to make sure that you get involved in social life again, and I mean not just school. I know that its hard to go out and do stuff with your friends when all you want to do is lay in your bed and Skype your friends and family from "over there" but its the easiest way to get over homesickness. If you got up and out with your friends then try to focus on what you're doing with them and don't talk about your exchange year a lot because that is not only going to make you sad, it also will make them feel unwanted and they might get jealous or even mad (believe me its better to answer "it was good", when you get asked how your year was, then actually telling them how amazing it was and how much you loved it and miss it now). Pick up a sport or a hobby that you couldn't do over there or even try new hobbies, but make sure that it is something that you actually enjoy because it doesn't help a bit when you have to constantly force yourself to do it, it will help you focussing on positive things and keep you happy. And most importantly spend time with your family. Your family is the most important thing that you have in your home country and it will be an every day reminder on why it was a good decision to stay.
I tried all of those things and they all worked for me but I think its the little things too, like having something to look forward too that you can only have in your home country (like certain groceries or a special event) and the most important thing to remember is to give yourself time to readjust. Feeling home back in your home doesn't work from one day to another (maybe for some people), it takes time and its important that you don't stress yourself to adjust faster. If you feel bad for feeling bad then it will take even longer so you got to understand that what you're feeling is normal and it will go by eventually but if you give it some time and put some effort into readjusting you will feel better soon.

In case you can't get over it and you decide to go back to the place of your exchange year to study there or work or even be an au pair then its super important to still do all the things i just mentioned to readjust to your home country but it will be a lot easier. I decided to go back to america to study there and I almost immediately felt better. I was relieved and it was a lot easier for me to focus on my home country and my friends and family here because I knew it wouldn't be forever and I have to make the days count with the people I love and I will miss. What im saying is that when you know your time in your home country is limited you are seeing everything differently. Yes you will be still homesick but you start to value the great sides of your home country so much more and you might even notice great things you haven't noticed before. Like I said i felt relieved as soon as i decided to go back but I also started noticing more and more things that I will miss once im gone and now (a couple of months later) Im actually sad about leaving this place, my friends and my family behind while im happy to be able to go back abroad. Knowing I will go back helped me so much to feel home in my home country again and still, I know I will feel home in america again as well.

So to all of you exchange students out there who are so confused to be back in a home away from home, I can honestly tell y'all that it will get better! You will all find a way to readjust to your home country and keep in touch with hour home abroad, just give it some time!!!

Thursday, January 1, 2015

Long-distance relationships

Hey guys,

As you all know I am in a long-distance relationship and I am as happy as possible.
I think its time to tell you about the pros and cons and how it really is.
A relationship like this is basically the same than every other one except you don't see each other (haha how funny) but it really is. You fight in every relationship, you laugh, cry, fall asleep and wake up together in every relationship it just not exactly the same. I can just talk about my example of the long-distance relationship but I think me and my boyfriend are a very good team when it comes to that and we get trough everything together. So I haven't seen him for 4 months now and even though we haven't touched each other or talked in person we are very happy. I am not going to lie it is hard and we have to fight for our love every day but its possible and we're making it work.
Our relationship wouldn't be this happy if we hadn't some rituals or some very simple things were doing. The first and most important thing for us to make it work is that we know what the other one is doing all the time. Not all the time in super much details but at least i always know when he's home safe or spending time with his family or friends and he knows that about me. The second thing is that were fighting for each other all the time, its not like he is my boyfriend now so I never have to tell him compliments or appreciate what he's doing no more, I try my best to show him all the time how much he means to me and he does the same thing for me. Another very important thing is that we are texting each other good morning and goodnight even though were 7 hours apart and that we keep on texting when the other is asleep just to make 'em smile in the morning. Something really helpful is that we both have something we can look forward too. Right now I can't wait to see him again because he's going to be here in a couple of weeks.
Besides all these things that are working out very well there are of course moments where we just fight and cry and miss each other so much but those moments can be very well obviated, yet not prevented. Its very important to not let it be too long between the skyping times, not to be all to jealous and to have trust and a lot of faith in each other.

All what i said is based on my experiences and on what me and my boyfriend think is important and good for our relationship. Other people might feel different about certain things or have different opinion on the whole thing and we know that. I hope this may help anybody but even if not its still gonna be how we are happy.

Saturday, November 29, 2014

Christmas spirit

Hey guys,
Well this is hard now, I haven't been blogging in forever and im really sorry for that but I decided to go back to blogging and start again. I don't really have a plan for what Im going to talk about for now on but I hope y'all are okay with a diary styled blog with all kinds of stuff and thoughts. I don't want to make any promises on what Im gonna post for sure because I know that I can't keep that.

So I have some exciting events coming up. well yes, we all know its Christmas time but for me it is a very special one. I am going to be with my boyfriend. He is coming up from texas and he will be spending some weeks in beautiful germany with me. Even though he's coming I still wish I could be spending this Christmas with my whole family.
Lately I've been very active on we<3it and Pinterest and they got me into the christmas spirit this year. I love christmas time so much. I love sitting at my window watching snow flakes falling down, drinking tea, watching christmas movies, making cookies, cuddling and being with people you love. Its not even december and I have everything already done. I got most of the gifts for my family and friends, and I decorated everything. Now I just need to put a cute wallpaper on my mobile devices and Im ready for Christmas. But its not only a happy time, its the time to pay attention on whats happening in the world and think about what you can do to help. There is so much going on in this world right now its insane. According to wikipedia there are more than 4 wars going on, the urkaine crisis is not included, there is hunger, sickness and poverty and most likely all of us have the privilege to live without any of those in our family. We should think twice about everything we do and be extra happy and thankful for what we have. Its on us to help those who are in need and I want to motivate every single one of you to help. Its not always about money (well yea donating is a great thing to do) its about spreading the word of god and giving hope. Hope and faith are things everyone of us needs and everyone of us can give easily. If you go through your world with your eyes open you will find a bunch of people in need in your community and sometimes just a smile can make their day.
:)



Sunday, September 7, 2014

Frio River- Cancun

Hey Guys,
I'm officially back from my summer break.
Today I wanted to show y'all some pictures I took on my last vacation in texas. Me, my family and a whole bunch of friends went to the Frio River. It was an amazing experience to float the river, make smores and have BBQ with all my family and friends. I couldn't take my camera with me to the river but I took some pictures with my phone.












This was probably my last post about my exchange year but I probably will still post something about my life in Texas since im going to be back there soon.

Sunday, June 29, 2014

Two worlds

That was it, I was sitting there, stuck between two worlds. I was crying because I didn't want to leave the place I called home for 6 moths and the friends and family I made but I was also all happy about seeing my friends and family again, wich i missed so much in these 6 months. And now some days after it, it feels still weird. I love my family and friends here and wouldn't trade them for anything and I love my friends and family over there as well. I feel home in two places in this world, and without the people of one place I can't really feel home at the other. I can't describe what my exchange year changed for me but it was a lot. I learned so much about me, my future, friendship, family, faith, trust, and a lot more. There are no words to describe how thankful I am for everything almost everybody in texas did for me, especially my wonderful host family. I don't want to live in america without my mom but i don't want to live in germany without my american mom either and its the same with almost everybody. I had a lot of trouble in germany before I left to the states and I never expected anything from this year but it turned out to be the best thing that could ever happen to me. Nobody who has never been part of an exchange program or who lived in a foreign country for longer than a couple of moths can understand the bond you get to your second home. Its something that nobody can ever take away from you.  I have to make up a lot of posts so don't wonder if you see new pictures from america on here during the upcoming weeks.
And i made a video at the airport in Frankfurt but the quality is super bad... if y'all want to see it anyways just like this post :D 

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Prom 2k14

I know its weird, I haven't posted something for a long long time and now im posting kinda daily.  But anyways, today I wanted to tell you about my first american Prom. It's theme was Royal Affair and it was awesome, everybody looked so beautiful!!
The americans celebrate Prom really big! Usually they order a Limousine and start getting ready early in the morning with appointments at the nail place and the hair place for getting their hair and makeup done, but I wanted to keep it a little smaller so I went to the nail place at 2 and my host mum did my hair while I did my makeup and all in all it just took me 3 hours to get ready. After that (5pm) I went to my boyfriends/dates house to take pictures with him and his sister and her boyfriend. The whole process of taking pictures with everyone, everywhere took us another 2 and a half hours. After that we left to Port Aransas to take Pictures at the beach and had dinner at a really cool restaurant. The restaurant was kind of beachy so we catched everybody's eyes in our dresses and tuxedos. Our waiter was really nice to us and paid for all our food *_* we couldn't believe it but he was serious.
The actual dance started at 7pm but we ran very late and arrived at 9.30pm :D so we just got to dance for about an our and a half before everybody left to go to one of the famous "Promafterparties". I didn't go but my friends said it was a lot of fun. All in all I had a amazing night and its probably one of my favorite memories of america.











Tuesday, June 3, 2014

The little things

Hey guys,
besides the fact that i have to make up so many posts about the big things that happened in the past month i just wanted to share some really cool pictures with y'all. Past saturday I had some of my closest friends over. Allie, Dominick, Juliet and Claudia. Dominick happened to be a proud owner of a brand-new nikon camera and of course we had to do a little shoot with it. It was already late so we didn't really get to take as many pictures as we wanted but we had a long time to edit them and i think some of them came out really good.  I have always a very very good time with these guys and Im gonna miss them so much!!!!!! They showed me how funny sarcasm is and they teached me  not to take everything so serious.... I love y'all guys! Thanks for everything!! btw allie and juliet y'all look fierce!